Watch Who You’re With: Your Relationships Matter

Hey guys,

Once again, I know it’s been a while, and I’m done apologizing for my absences because I know with bible school starting in a few months that apologies will quickly become my only posts on here and I don’t want that. So, from now on, I’ll post when I post, I’m no longer a consistent blogger like I was in my younger teen years. The Grace that posted twice a week is long gone.

I do, however, have a post for y’all today (shocker, I know).

Our Sunday morning Bible class in my congregation just began going through James, we finished the first chapter a few weeks ago.

A comment stuck out to me during the class and I keep going back and expanding on it, so here I am.

We read through James 1:13-14:

“Let no man say when he is tempted, I am tempted of God: for God cannot be tempted with evil, neither tempteth he any man:

 But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust, and enticed.”

Then, the speaker made the comment that I’ve been thinking about, “We are tempted when we are drawn away of our own lusts, enticed. This means you need to be careful. you have to watch who you’re with, you have to watch where you go.”

You have to watch who you’re with, you have to watch where you go.

I think it’s all too common for us to get careless sometimes.

“Do not be deceived: “Evil company corrupts good habits.”-1 Corinthians 15:33

How many times have we heard this verse in a lesson?

I’m sure most people reading this could quote it easily, yet, are we still deceived despite knowing this verse?

We are warned of many types of friendships in the Bible.

We are warned about being friends with:

  • Foolish people (Proverbs 14:6-7).
  • Gossips and flatters (Proverbs 20:19).
  • Angry people (Proverbs 22:24-25).
  • Brethren who won’t turn from their sins (1 Corinthians 5:1-11).

Why is it so important to watch who we’re with? Why does the Bible warn against walking with certain people so many different times and so bluntly?

Because we become who we are around.

You are the company you keep.

“…Lest thou learn his ways, and get a snare to thy soul.”-Proverbs 22:25 (about being friends with an angry man).

Who your best friend is matters.

When I became a Christian, I noticed a shift in my friendships. Suddenly, I realized how superficial the majority of my high school ones were and I couldn’t talk about spiritual matters to them without them rolling their eyes and saying, “Grace, all you talk about is the Bible now.” And they would try to pull me back to my old ways.

They didn’t like that I no longer participated in certain things like prom, dressing immodestly, or swearing because it implied that them doing it was also wrong, so they tried to get me back on their side again. They told me to loosen up, asked me what the big deal was, asked me why it mattered, and then brushed off my answers because they didn’t truly care what the Bible said, they wanted to do what they wanted to do.

It was discouraging and I felt so alone, I was overjoyed when I started making friends in my new congregation who enjoyed having those conversations with me because it mattered to them too.

I remember the first time one of my good friends called me out on using a euphemism when I had first been converted, I had no idea what she meant, but she explained it to me with such patience. I realized that having friends that aren’t afraid to show you when you’re falling short, matters. Those are the type of people I want to be close friends with, the ones I know have the same goals as me and will help me be the best I can be.

You need friends who care about your spiritual wellbeing. I’m not saying to never be friends with non-Christians or weak Christians, do be their friend.

Be an example and a teacher if possible, but don’t forget to find strong Christians to be friends with too, make those your best friends because they’re the ones who will have your back.

You need friends who remind you of your goals, remind you of the truth of God’s word, and keep you accountable.

If your friends aren’t drawing you nearer to God, you need to take a second and ask yourself who or what they’re drawing you to instead.

Do not be deceived, bad company ruins good morals.

“Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour.

For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow: but woe to him that is alone when he falleth; for he hath not another to help him up.”-Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

Don’t only be friends with people who aren’t able to help you up because they are down themselves.

On the same note: who you’re dating matters as well.

“Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?”-2 Corinthians 6:14

When I first became allowed to date there were a few guys that liked me and even tried asking me out, but I quickly told them no because I had promised myself that I would never date a non-Christian, as well as raising my standards in other areas that non-Christian guys didn’t even come close to meeting.

I’m so glad I never settled for less.

I’ve watched so many dear friends struggle in their unequally yoked relationships and feel discouraged with their partner’s loose morals or lack of interest in the Bible, while my boyfriend is a constant encouragement and is always reminding me of the truth in God’s word. This contrast alone makes me thank God that I stuck to my standards and never let them slip, especially in that area.

God needs to be first, no matter what, and this includes in your relationships.

If your significant other doesn’t even put God first in their own life, God and honoring Him won’t be put first in y ‘all’s relationship.

1 Corinthians 10:31 tells us to glorify God in whatever we do, you want someone who has that same goal as you from the start of your relationship.

Don’t date someone who you already know doesn’t share your values and morals, that is a recipe for failure and heartbreak. It is way easier to be pulled down to someone’s level than to pull them up to yours.

I’ve watched many of my guy and girl friends date people simply because they were attractive or because they were desperate for a significant other and the person liked them, the Bible says in Proverbs 31:30 that “Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.” This goes for guys too, the most important thing in our lives is God, make sure that’s the most important thing in your partner’s life.

One of your first reasons, if not the first reason, for liking or dating someone should be their love and obedience to the Lord, not their looks, not the way they say your name, not the romantic dates they promise to take you on, but their love for the Lord and His church.

Please learn from the mistakes of Samson and Solomon.

I’ve seen so many problems stem from dating people who don’t have the same morals and goals as you.

Put your relationship with God first, don’t even look at non-Christians as boyfriend or girlfriend material because right now they are a lost soul and they need Jesus, not a relationship.

A Christian relationship is worth the wait, trust me.

Do not be deceived, bad company ruins good morals.

We have to watch who we’re with, we have to watch where we go, especially in relationships with others.